Medical Nazis

I'm not very good at sitting around!  I imagine it takes about 15 minutes of watching me to realize that I'm a person who is on the go for most of my waking hours.  This being said, I do have three medical conditions that can stop me in my tracks.  Asthma, Arthritis and Chronic Migraine, the only problem is that I usually fight my body's needs to attend to these conditions until my body just stops, refuses to comply and I have no choice but to lay my butt down.  Enter the medical Nazis in my life!

The first medical Nazi is my neurologist!  I love my neurologist as he tries to keep me on the go. I have to keep a journal on my migraines in order to identify triggers, in order to avoid triggers, in order to reduce my body's natural tendency to either attack itself, or inflame itself (hence the asthma, arthritis, and migraines), in order to have more healthy days, in order to live the life I want to.  That's a lot of orders, and I'm not so good taking orders. I have a regimen of seizure meds that I take as a preventive, magnesium to reduce inflammation and migraines, a migraine diet I suppose to follow and a sleep schedule that... well let's say that I try, but don't often hit the mark. I'm easily distracted, which I'm sure irritates my neurologist who has to remind me of said orders at every visit.

The second medical Nazis are my children. Here's a public service announcement for the masses, NEVER take your 9 year old with the same chronic conditions to the doctor with you and allow him to ask the question, "How can I help my mom?" Probably not the best idea to let your students/athletes (who think that they're your kids) talk to your children about your condition,s or answer honestly student/athlete questions about how you treat your conditions.  I have created my own little (and big) watch dog group and they are persistent and tenacious!  Alarm go off to take my meds and I don't jump right to and take them? Well a kid will just go get them, bring me a drink and watch me take them.  They'll even check under my tongue to make sure I swallowed them.  Rub my head at school and three students are running to turn off the florescent lights and shout, "We have to be quiet because the teacher's head hurts!"  If they see you eating a hot dog and chocolate... well let's just say the lecture on combining two triggers is long and the food will be cold and you won't eat it! Mission accomplished and children are happy!

The last medical Nazi is my husband! He asks me every day and will text me at his lunch break, 'How's your head?"  He expects an answer too, preferably quickly. When he's home, or we go out, he watches for any signs of an impending attack, or signs of a current attack. As of yet, I have not been very successful in hiding signs from him, so when he sees one, twenty questions begin! 'Did you take your meds? When's the last time you ate? What did you eat? How long did you sleep? Let me look at your face to see if it's sagging? Are you seeing spots?" There's probably a 100 more, but I'll spare you the interrogation! If my answers don't meet his approval then I'm sent to eat, sit down or to bed! Strict orders to rest and leave your mother alone are given. Again, I'm not real good with orders....even when they are given for my own good.... Well you can see how this probably goes on most days.

I appreciate my medical Nazis.  They all try to help me live the best life possible and have more good days!  I know that they are trying to help because they care.  They even tell me I'm a great person to be around when I feel good!  As much as I seemed annoyed at all the attention, deep down I know it's for my own good and they're coming from a place of love. I'm sure they would greatly appreciate it if I would just comply with directives given and it's a shame that I fight they're orders, but I'm sure they would be panic stricken if I didn't. So, thank you medical Nazis that keep me in line!  I love you too!