Running Not Happy

Despite what my headband says, my first run in almost three weeks was not happy! The leader of my running group texted me to see how I was. I wanted to text back I'm fat, fatigued and weak so I guess I just suck! That's not what anyone wants to hear (or read). A long involved text on adjusting to having Hashimoto disease and its annoying side effects isn't what anyone wants to read either. So today, partially motivated by guilt for missing the last three running dates and partiality motivated by the pictures and posts of my little sister's weight loss, I went for a run when I got home from work. It was a little demoralizing to be honest.

I only ran for 15 minutes. I went with my nine year old who ran with a bottle of water and a bag of chips. The tech shirt from a 2012 half marathon that used to be a little big held my stomach snuggly so it wouldn't jiggle. My muscles fatigue quickly due to the Hashimoto's. After the first minute, my legs felt like fifty pound weights each. The nine year old chomped on chips and chatted the entire way. My fingers and feet swelled to twice their normal size. After 1.2 miles I was sweaty and ready to go to bed for the night! Definitely not the definition of Run Happy.

So, what's changed from a month ago of happily running ten miles on a Saturday to wanting to sit on the curb and cry until someone comes to pick me up? Currently I weigh 160 pounds. This is down from my heaviest of 164. One of the great side effects of Hashimoto disease is unexplained weight gain. I walk on average three miles a day at work. Even after training for my fall half marathon and eating only 1800 calories a day, I gained ten pounds. The doctor and my husband have both told me it is the Hashimoto and not me. Nice of them to say, but they're not looking at my fat face and tight clothes. (The fat face is also a side effect of the Hashimoto.) The joint swelling and muscle fatigue are also part of the Hashimoto's. Fun times when your body attacks itself, fun times.

Depression is a side effect too. Who knew your thyroid controlled so much of your life? I'm not real good with controlling people or diseases apparently. I'd like to rip my thyroid out and just get to regulating it so I can feel like myself, but the doctor says its better to let it go on a long run slowly,  very slowly.  I spent the rest of the night pouting and being more disagreeable than a toddler at bed time. My poor husband tried on numerous occasions to cheer me up to no avail. Everyone should get a day or two to waller, but now I'm done. Running has saved my life before and I owe it more than Hashimoto. 

I have taken some positive steps to manage the side effects and should start seeing results soon. I took the picture to help document the process for the next time I think I suck! What proactive steps have i taken? Glad tou asked! I replaced two cokes a day with water. I replaced my chocolate mouse at lunch with a sugar free version. I'm taking my perscribed vitiams and I'm walking or running after work, despite feeling like napping would be much more productive to my health. My husband refuses to buy a scale so I can check my weight as he feels I might get obsessive about the numbers, instead of my health. Still working on that, but Saturdays I can step on the scale at the grocery store. I'll keep you posted and hopefully I'll be running happy again soon!