Too Much

Some days are just too much! Some diseases' side effects are too much and some days life in general is too much! One of the great side effect of Hashimoto's is weight gain. A second side effect is depression. When the two meet at 5:30 in the morning its too much!

I have a favorite dress fron LL Bean's. Its plaid and flannel and comfortable. I had bought large tights to wear with my favorite dress since it is finally cold enough in South Georgia to wear it. I was prepared for it to be a little tighter than last winter, but when I couldn't even pull it down over my chest and then I had to ask my husband to get the dress off. It was a struggle!  I was near tears!

As if that wasn't enough indignity, the new tights I bought wouldn't even go up over my calves. That was too much! I was fighting back tears, looking for something to wear that was professional looking and I could fit in! There wasn't much to choose from which depressed me further.
Since I've never heard of anyone calling in sick because they got stuck in their favorite dress and were dissolving into tears, I resolved myself to the fact that it was going to be a fat day and there wasn't much I was going to do about it. Hopefully,  my coworkers wouldn't notice and since they've never seen my favorite dress I figured I could suck it up and carry on.

When one of my coworkers told me I looked liked Mary Poppins it was too much. I wanted to go home sick. Today Hashimoto's side effects were too much today. Hopefully I'll have better luck starting my day tomorrow.  I hear elastic waist pants accommodate too much so, I might start there!

How You Know You're Rasing a Running Junkie

I try to raise my kids with the end in mind, meaning that they will be haapy, well adjusted, productive members of society.  I think I might be raising some running junkies instead.  Here are the tell tale signs.
1. Your kid can tell the difference between a tech tee and a cotton tee.
2. Your kid owns more tech tees than cotton tees.
3. Your kid knows how to use the stick after a race.
4. Your kid knows what a foam roller is for and its not for play.
5. After running around in the yard, they tell you their calves are a little tight.
6. They want their own running belt with bib clips because they don't want to risk chaffing.
7. They don't own "cheap" running shoes.
8. Child not only can tell you what over pronation is, they can identify three people at the race who do it.
9. They know exactly how many miles are in a 5K 10K and 15K.
10. When asked to sleep over a friend's house they say they can't because they have a race in the morning.
11. A family vacation always involves some type of running event.
12. Child owns arm sleeves and or compression sleeves.
13. They know their mother's pr in the 5K, 10K and half marathon.
14. They tell people its ONLY three miles when asked about the distance of a race.
15. They know where to go in a starting corrall without being told.
16. They clap, high five and say thank you to every volunteer on the course.
17. They recognize the beep from a watch means an interval is starting or stopping.
18. They can drink a cup of water, while running without spilling it everywhere.
19. They know how to look up their times from the most recent race on the website.
20. Understand the value of a nap after the long run!

Running Not Happy

Despite what my headband says, my first run in almost three weeks was not happy! The leader of my running group texted me to see how I was. I wanted to text back I'm fat, fatigued and weak so I guess I just suck! That's not what anyone wants to hear (or read). A long involved text on adjusting to having Hashimoto disease and its annoying side effects isn't what anyone wants to read either. So today, partially motivated by guilt for missing the last three running dates and partiality motivated by the pictures and posts of my little sister's weight loss, I went for a run when I got home from work. It was a little demoralizing to be honest.

I only ran for 15 minutes. I went with my nine year old who ran with a bottle of water and a bag of chips. The tech shirt from a 2012 half marathon that used to be a little big held my stomach snuggly so it wouldn't jiggle. My muscles fatigue quickly due to the Hashimoto's. After the first minute, my legs felt like fifty pound weights each. The nine year old chomped on chips and chatted the entire way. My fingers and feet swelled to twice their normal size. After 1.2 miles I was sweaty and ready to go to bed for the night! Definitely not the definition of Run Happy.

So, what's changed from a month ago of happily running ten miles on a Saturday to wanting to sit on the curb and cry until someone comes to pick me up? Currently I weigh 160 pounds. This is down from my heaviest of 164. One of the great side effects of Hashimoto disease is unexplained weight gain. I walk on average three miles a day at work. Even after training for my fall half marathon and eating only 1800 calories a day, I gained ten pounds. The doctor and my husband have both told me it is the Hashimoto and not me. Nice of them to say, but they're not looking at my fat face and tight clothes. (The fat face is also a side effect of the Hashimoto.) The joint swelling and muscle fatigue are also part of the Hashimoto's. Fun times when your body attacks itself, fun times.

Depression is a side effect too. Who knew your thyroid controlled so much of your life? I'm not real good with controlling people or diseases apparently. I'd like to rip my thyroid out and just get to regulating it so I can feel like myself, but the doctor says its better to let it go on a long run slowly,  very slowly.  I spent the rest of the night pouting and being more disagreeable than a toddler at bed time. My poor husband tried on numerous occasions to cheer me up to no avail. Everyone should get a day or two to waller, but now I'm done. Running has saved my life before and I owe it more than Hashimoto. 

I have taken some positive steps to manage the side effects and should start seeing results soon. I took the picture to help document the process for the next time I think I suck! What proactive steps have i taken? Glad tou asked! I replaced two cokes a day with water. I replaced my chocolate mouse at lunch with a sugar free version. I'm taking my perscribed vitiams and I'm walking or running after work, despite feeling like napping would be much more productive to my health. My husband refuses to buy a scale so I can check my weight as he feels I might get obsessive about the numbers, instead of my health. Still working on that, but Saturdays I can step on the scale at the grocery store. I'll keep you posted and hopefully I'll be running happy again soon!

The Big Reveal

Wouldn't it be nice if doctors revealed your diagnosis like they do on the television?  Just think, friends and family surround you as you return from your fully paid for spa vacation. You arrive at the doctors in some fancy car that has a driver and the doctor meets you at the door ready to reveal (and hopefully fix) what's been making you feel like crap forever! I think it would be better than the anticlimactic way we do it now! At least I'd feel like I got my copays worth.

None of that happened of course when I went to the endocrinologist.  We waited thirty minutes in the waiting room. Then we had to tell the nurse that she was missing two test. The nurse was friendly and told us that some of my blood work looked good and some did not. Like I wasn't nervous enough. My sweet husband then waited with me another fifteen minutes for the doctor to come in. With little fan fare the doctor asked me if any of my symptoms had changed (which they had not but muscle fatigue) and then announced that I had Hashimoto disease. My thyroid could last ten years or ten weeks. I can plan on having bouts/flare ups until the doctor decides my thyroid is ineffective.  That was the anticlimactic reveal of why I've been feeling like crap the last couple months! It took me the rest of the day to learn to say the new disease the right way. I still slip and call it Qusimodo disease.

There were some other instructions too. Every couple months I have to get my thyroid levels tested frequently and take some vitiams that my body has trouble processing due to my thyroid. My lovely husband gets to watch for swelling of my face and depression. He also gets to tell me when I'm getting fat and over tired. Poor man didn't sign on for babysitting a grown woman, but he does! I've included a picture of my wonderful hubby who loves and supports me!

Medical Test Done Like I Run...

This is a post from two weeks ago I wasn't sure I wanted to share yet since we won't get a diagnosis until November 26, but I decided it might help others or at least entertain them!

Yesterday started at 4am! Not for a race (which will be this Saturday) but to drive three hours for a "NUCLEAR" scan! My appointment for my thyroid ultrasound was at 8am and I was told to allow thirty minutes for registration, as the hospital has a new records system called epic! Epic was a good name because the registration process took two hours.  Two hours sitting in the waiting room, just to be taken to a room with a radioactive sign on the door and given a magic pill.

The pill was so magic that the guy wouldn't even touch the lead bottle and wouldn't help me open it when I couldn't get the "safety" cap off. When I asked for assistance he told me thst he couldn't touch the bottle. I then asked him how the bottle got on the table if he couldn't touch it.  He didn't have an answer fo that but did advise i could get the bottle open by pushing the cap down and up at the same time.  I got the bottle open and the guy reminded me again not to touch the pill. Really? I asked if its not safe to touch then how the hell was I supposed to swallow the pill since my toungue would be in contact with the pill! He was not impressed with my questions of the obvious and replied the test was medically necessary and take the pill.

It was a blue and white pill. I took it then was told to come back in four hours for my scan and uptake test. Oh and by the way you'll have to come back tomorrow to finish the test. Never have I had a medical test that was so slow to complete! Slow to get results back yes, but to administer? I could run two half marathons and clean my house in the time it took to finish with this test.

Apparently,  when you ask too many obvious questions you get the new tech that does not speak a great deal of English when you come back. She was very nice and only had to repeat one of the scans, but unlike the guy from the morning she attempted to explain what was going on. She worked like I run- slow and methodical. The test got done and unlike the couple of hours I wait to check my race time, I will wait a couple weeks for the results from the magic pill. Guess running slow has prepared me once again for waiting to get to the finish line!

One Step Forward, One Step Back

I was supposed to run 12 miles last Saturday,  but instead walked 2.5 and started to bleed from my biopsy.  I didn't realize that your uterus would take so long to heal from a "minimum invasive procedure," but it did take two rounds to get the sample. Note to anyone reading this. .. minimum invasive procedure is a relative term, meaning its going to hurt like hell, but the insurance company says we can do it in the office with no pain meds! I had the biopsy Thursday evening and Wednesday was the first day of no bleeding and no cramping. One step closer to answers, one step further away from my marathon training.

Finding answers is not easy, but like my workout plan, I keep checking off tests and possibilities.  Its a tiring and frustratingly long process, which is probably like training for a marathon. Unlike finishing a race, I'm not sure what emotions will be on the other side of whatever diagnosis I'm given. Like a finish line in a race, I would like to get a diagnosis quickly so I can get on with my life!

Lots Going on and 135 Days Until I Run A Marathon

Its been awhile since I've written anything on this blog. I've been a little busy tracking down some health issues. I've been pretty exhausted for the last couple months and at first I thought it was starting a new job and increasing mileage,  but a blood test indicated that I have thyroid issues. A subsequent visit to the doctor has lead to more tests and a working diagnosis of hyperthyroidism. Yeah something new. Since treatment depends on what is causing the hyperthyroidism,  I'm trudging through appointments and tests one at a time.

With 135 days until my first marathon, one of my biggest fears is correcting the thyroid will interrupt my training, or worse, cancel it all together. I'm too far in now to bail. I completed my first ten miler of the training plan and will run my third half marathon of the year on November 9. I religiously meet my running group bright and early Saturday mornings and run the proscribed distance.  Ironically,  its the training for the marathon that has put this most recent health crisis in perspective. Its early and dark when we meet. The only thing I know is the distance for the day. I trust our pace leader to lead us, while I put one foot in front of the other. The sun come up half way through the run. We finish the run with smiles and promises that we'll stick with the program.

How has marathon training prepared me for this recent health crisis? I've met the doctors in the dark about my condition. The doctors, like my pace group leader, has the plan and since this is not my area of expertise,  I have to trust the doctor will make sure I finish in good shape. With each new ordered test and appointment I approach them with the same mindset as the long run...just keep putting one foot in front of the other. This mindset has served me well through marathon training and I hope it will find me smiling and happy with the treatment plan.

I'll keep y'all posted on the running and the treatment.  Three more tests left and a follow up to come, but if you want to see what gives me the mental toughness to deal with these medical issues, come watch me run in Columbus on November 9.